THE GOINGS ON AT RAMSDEN HALL SCHOOL

                           Introduction








This school is situated near Ramsden Heath village in Essex.
The nearest town is Billericay.


Ramsden Hall has had its fair share of bullies.






Once upon a time, at Ramsden Hall, Graham Trousers found a bowl of soup inside his bedside locker. He reported it to Mr. Lion, the headmaster.


Mr. Lion said'
'Whoever did this to you will have his weekend leave stopped."


The head ordered every boy to stand in the entrance hall.


"Own up you lot, said the head teacher.
If the culprit's not found you boys will get shot at midnight."


In the end the notorious bully, Fish Fingers, owned up.
he got expelled.


then there was another bully called Rubber Shirt, who brought a can of bees into his dormitory.
He let the bees loose and sent them buzzing around the dormitory.
All the boys ran for their lives. But one boy Soapy Kidney, got out his nail gun and shot nails at the bees.


Rubber shirt got a real pasting from his classmates.


The big bully got thrown out of the window.


Once in Ramsden Hall the headmaster's office got robbed.
The whole room was stripped bare.
The headmaster saw what had happened and went round asking every boy if he was the robber.


Most boys said that they had nothing to do with the robbery.


"If no boy owns up said the furious head every boy will get 500 strokes of the cane and have their weekend leave stopped."


In the end Basher Bloggs, a big stout prefect who bullied boys owned up.
He got tied to a sausage and caned 500 times.


Soon after Basher Bloggs got caned the headmaster put him on a dinner plate so all the boys could eat him, but the big bully jumped off the plate and ran away.
The headmaster, Mr.Lion, ordered all the boys to go and look for him.


the boys searched the school to see if the bully was hiding in a dustbin.


The bully, Basher Bloggs,was found inside a locker.
the head expelled him.


When the big bully go expelled he got sent to a boarding school up in the sky.
In this boarding school boys were made to eat bedside lockers and touch the sun.


One day a big bully called Clive Raspberry threw a boy into a snake pit.
The bully then threw a sack of potatoes onto the boy.


As the snakes were about to attack the boy he flew out of the snake pit but Clive Raspberry followed him and stole his head.


"Gimme back me 'ead shouted Terry Shoepolish."


But the big bully took no notice.


All of a sudden Milk Pudding, the school's headmaster,appeared and said:
'Hey Master Raspberry, give back Terry shoepolish's head."
But the big bully took no notice and ran off.


"If you don't give back Terry Shoepolish's head, I'll poke a broom into your mouth."
"Oh, cook yourself Headmaster face.
"Right, I'm going to send a lion after you."


So the headmaster produced a lion from his own chest and sent it charging after Clive Raspberry, the big bully, causing him to drop his head that he stole from terry Shoepolish.


In the end the stolen head flew back onto its owner.


For his punishment Clive Raspberry, the big bully, was made to chase dinner plates up into the sky.


Clive Raspberry, the notorious bully had a bad reputation.
he once dumped cement onto a boy's dinner plate.
the dinner plate cried its eyes out and told the headmaster.
he reported it and gave the bully six strokes of the sausage.
After he got sausaged Clive Raspberry was made to do hard work, like scrubbing floors and digging the garden with his head.


In the end the big bully got booted out of Sea Bog School, a boarding school in the sky, and collected by helicopter which took him down to Ramsden hall.


To stop him from bullying the big bully had his head locked away.




                                Conclusion:






Ramsden Hall was always a haven for big bullies and school teachers with size 200 feet.


Any bully who  went too far got sent to Sea Bog, a boarding school up in the sky.